The NFL doesn’t sleep. Even when the schedule is clear and there isn’t even a practice to be found, the league finds ways to draw eyeballs.

This spring, that has meant a handful of events detailing new uniforms in the run-up to this year’s draft, where newly selected prospects can hold up fancy new jerseys (that, since they’re made by Fanatics, will probably have a typo or two). Five teams have unveiled new looks for 2024, ranging from the immediately dated to clean and classic. These fits range from familiar to foreign, with some teams opting for ambitious overhauls and the Cleveland Browns saying “you know what, let’s just change our facemask a little.”

Who’ll wear it best this fall? Let’s take a look.

5

Denver Broncos

 

via Twitter.com/Broncos

Behold, the uniforms of a team that’s about to go 3-5 in the Mountain West:


 

Where’s the helmet stripe? Why the peek-a-boo shoulder stripes? And why are the old Orange Crush uniforms only getting worn twice a year???

4

Cleveland Browns

 

via ClevelandBrowns.com

It’s a good look. Clean, simple and, uh, extremely sponsored.

Tide sponsored a facemask, guys. The NFL laughs when a butcher, presented with a pig, wastes the squeal.

3

Detroit Lions

 

via DetroitLions.com

Detroit had a whole event to unveil these. Lots of people showed up at Ford Field! There was a band! And then the uniforms turned out to pretty much be the same as last year’s with some different stripe and lettering options. It’s … fine.

2

Houston Texans

 

via HoustonTexans.com

Well, the Texans are certainly going for it. But I like the splashes of Oilers blue in the Color Rush uniform, even if there’s a lot — hooo buddy, a lot — going on here. And that’s not all! Houston’s Battle Red alternates get a new helmet logo, which is bold even if you can’t really see it that well against the red chrome of the dome itself.


 

The Texans get bumped up a notch because Paul Wall performed at their launch party. You guys know Paul Wall, right? Perhaps you mistook him for an ant because he’s low to the earth?


 

1

New York Jets

 

via NewYorkJets.com

Leaning into a good-looking throwback is always a safe idea. New York wore these kits a bit last season and looked so good they made them the full-time option.

It’s an updated version of the uniforms New York wore from 1979 to 1989, which weren’t exactly prosperous times but, hey, we’re dealing with the Jets. There are no tapered lines (outside of maybe the collar) and the bold striping creates a pleasant contrast between two simple, powerful colors. Plus, the Eddie Money-era Jets jet on the helmet? Hell yeah.